May We Dance Upon Their Graves

Incest Survivors, Spirituality and Ceremonies of Justice – the story of a woman living a rich, fulfilling life while waiting to dance on her sociopath father's grave.

Icing my vulva

I’ve had pain and itching in my vulva for most of my life.  I’ve worn out holes in the fronts of underwear from scratching. This, I’ve found through some recent reading, is actually pretty common with vaginal injuries like mine.

This summer, when I found out about the two tear scars and vascular damage, it all began to make sense. The medical professional that saw me suggested I ice my vulva when I was feeling pain or discomfort. Well she said something cool, and I’m using a well wrapped ice pack.

It works. It actually works and I don’t have to dissociate from that part of my body any more.

The pain happens without warning, and I’ve gotten accustomed to ignoring it. But now I have something to do about it, something that works.

So tonight I’m sitting on an ice pack, watching TV.

May you rot in hell, Dad.

This, as my friend Butterfly would say, is why you shouldn’t fuck kids.

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4 comments on “Icing my vulva

  1. kate1975
    November 9, 2009

    Hi SDW,

    I’m sorry this happens. I’m glad that you have found something that works and makes it possible for you not to dissociate and to take care of your body in a healthier way. What a great accomplishment. Good for you.

    Good and healing thoughts to you.

    Kate

  2. Kerro
    November 10, 2009

    I’m also glad you found something that works. When I read your post I thought, “of course” because they give ice packs to women post birth. I’m glad it’s helping.

  3. Pingback: What I learned about health care and survivors (part 1) | May We Dance Upon Their Graves

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This entry was posted on November 8, 2009 by in Medical Care and Sexual Abuse Survivors and tagged , , , , .

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